No matter how difficult things get in your family, at the end of the day you are always standing firm for each other. One word against any of your family member, and you are ready with the coffin. Every family, when analyzed as a whole, has same types of elements in them. This may be a justification for the fact we all have inherited our genes from single ancestor. It is like a tree that shed nuts on shaking. Personally speaking, my own family is a just a tent away from a full blown circus. And, I can see the essence of characters of family in almost every other family I come across. So I thought, why not make a summary of the unique elements of the big fat Indian family.
“Haye Daiyya” Mothers
No matter how convincingly you drag her from a certain topic she will always find a loose end to relate it with others. It is amazing how conversation starts with filling up the bottles and within 10 minutes she is reading out your grades of last quarterly exam.
“Too cool or too hot” Daddies
We know the difference between “Daddy” and “Pitaji.” You either have a father who is always ready to shield you from the so called “Flying Chappal” or you have a father who is owner of the “Flying Chappal.” At the end of the day, the only pillar you can rely upon is your dad, without any doubt.
“Always loving” Grandma
The one who is always ready to feed you. Even though you gain tons of weight, the scanner in her eyes will always find the protein deficiency syndrome in your body. You can always count on her when you fall short of your pocket money.
“Sawa Sher” Grandpa
He provides you with all the secrets of your father or mother, so that you can use them as weapons in next argument. Taking him for a morning or evening walk is always the best thing to do, because then you can tell him all your secrets. You can count on him when your Dadi falls short of money. You are longing to hear “Chup kar! Mai tera baap hu” thing and see your parents getting trolled officially.
The Military Man
We all have an at least one defense personnel who has stiff moustache and strict personality. When he/she is home, everybody is silent for no reason. Although they are cool but every word from their mouth is like the command given during parades.
“Oversmart” Mausa Ji
He is expert in almost all the domains and is always ready to give you free advices. Be it career guidance or financial advice, he is ready with charts and analysis for all the topics. He is the exclusive owner of “Arrey hum to kehte hain ye kar lijiye dot com.”
The Ghost Hunter
There is always one person in your family who can scare the shit out of you. No matter what, they will always end up talking about ghosts and spirits. And when all of you are finally sweating under your pants, he/she will be the one who says “Daro mat, kuch nahi hoga.” *man you have no right to say this*
The Stingy Uncle
He is always like “Arrey iski kya zarurat hai” type of person who has no intention to give you anything. He is a tough nut and it requires lot of tricks to get a small penny out of his pockets. You always need to talk in terms of figures with him so that he can deny in clear cut manner.
The Benchmark Cousin
Here we are taking both the benchmarks into account. Yes! The studious and the lunatic. These two will be the perfect examples of do’s and don’ts. The studious one is pain in your ass because you get compared to him/her after every exam. The notorious one is someone you should be away from. Be anything, but don’t become like the latter.
She can’t get enough of complaining about anything and everything. You should always be careful when you get something for her as she is ready with her “ifs” and “buts.” You dare not try to convince her or you will end up apologizing for no reason.
He is always the one who is ready to pamper you and fulfill all your wishes. Ask for anything and he will get it without you having to answer anyone. He is apparently the super saver package who spoils you in every possible way.
“Aa bail mujhe maar” Cousin
Do not trust them. Even though they swear on God, they will land you into trouble at any cost. Especially when you are planning to keep a secret fun party, they will be sincere enough to inform each member of your family. All your plans are going into vain because they are involved in it.
You connect with them so well that he/she is just a twin for you. If nobody understands you, they will do. You can trust them for anything and share all your problems. At any point of time, you know that you have someone to talk to.
The cousins ranging from 0 to 6 years. You find them cute until they ask for your mobile to play games. It is mandatory to keep them away from your secret plans or else the whole locality knows it. They are useful when you are not innocent enough to ask for something.
“Old is Gold” but won’t make you happy
Last but not the least, they are oldest in your family and have “Life Goals.” No! They are not ambitious; they just want you to work harder. They keep asking you to get married or bear children, so that they can die peacefully.