STATUTORY WARNING: This is going to be a really long post. So, if you are among those who have better things to do than spending your eye-blinks on my 5 minutes post – STOP RIGHT HERE!
I completely understand. You guys are too busy liking lame ass trolls that feed on other people’s misery, following your favorite celebrity to check on what they are eating, where they are partying, or simply stalking your ex/crush, etc. No no! Don’t give me that look. You know, you do that.
If you are still reading it, I thank you so much.
You might be well aware of the situation in Bangalore.
Here’s a quickie –
|| Late on January 1, 2:45 am, a lady was molested by two men on a scooter while she was walking down the lane. The molesters pushed her to the ground and a few seconds later the two fled the place after she raised an alarm for help. ||
Well, that’s not all. Two or three unidentified beings (calling them ‘Humans’ would be a disgrace to the word) stood there wallowing in ignorance of the whole incident, as if it were a TV show. Not long ago, I had written an article depicting the grave problems that are associated with the “Bystander effect.” Might have skipped your feed. That’s okay! The internet makes mistakes sometimes. *winks*
Let us try to evaluate what goes through their minds:
“Lafde mei kaun padega yaar? Chodh na.”
Moreover, “Apni koi nahi lagti hain.”
Damn. I respect her a lot for crying out loud asking for help. But what if, what if the situation would’ve gone berserk? What if something terrible had happened to her?
The very next day we would find people walking down the streets, hurling abuses at the police authorities, organizing a candle march, holding placards demanding justice and other social propaganda.
My question is: Why wait for something to happen?
Do you even realize it could have happened to anybody? To your sister, daughter or even your mother. (It could have!) Would you pass the same statements and give it a cold shoulder? No. Then why did you do that to her? With Nirbhaya? With many such victims?
Actually the problem is that some people have been taught from a young age that ignorance is something that is acceptable. Anti-intellectualism stems from a culture that wants to ensure that people don’t get involved in any kind of political or social activity because that involves responsibility. Responsibility to stand up and speak the truth in front of the law, corroborate the happening. And we are super scared of that stuff right?
I pity such people. Moreover, I pity the land that has to bear the burden of such useless bums. The law will eventually take its course. What matters is how willing are you to be a Good Samaritan. Aahh! Fuck that shit. It is too formal. A GOOD HUMAN? Maybe?
And the height of Hypocrisy is when people start using “hash tags” like #NotAllMen to coat their shit with the very paint of innocence. Well, the problem doesn’t lie in the men alone. The problem lies in all of us. In the women, who try to choose to not report against an abuse with the fear that it might impair their “image” in the eyes of society. Because then she’ll be at the receiving end of all the brain-dead questions by the so-called society, like: Why were you alone? What were you doing outside at that point of the night? Why were you dressed so inappropriately? Inappropriate, my foot!
Why not go and ask the man who did this, questions like: What the fuck were you thinking while you were staring at her breasts thinking of them as babies who want to be cuddled? Who gave you the right to stalk her right up to her place of residence? Why were you staring and smiling at her, like she is some piece of meat waiting to be chewed? Go! Ask them that. You won’t, right? Because you belong to a kind that could cause an absolute mayhem all by themselves even in an empty room.
And about the comments that you pass on the dresses that we wear: “OMG! That is too tight, tiny or skimpy. Can’t she wear something less provocative? She is probably asking for it.” Whoa! Not dressing up as per your liking doesn’t mean we are asking for it. Tell me one thing, the next time you’re out and I find you not wearing any helmet, does that give me a right to smash your skull with a hammer? No? I mean, you asked for it, since you’re not wearing anything to protect it. Haaah! Fuck you and your double standards, society. Fuck you!
Dear people promoting “NotAllMen”, how insensitive can you get? We know you didn’t do it. Oh wait. Do you need a trophy or something for NOT MOLESTING a woman? Because that’s normal. Something to take in your stride, eh? Doesn’t sound cool, does it? Therefore, instead of wasting time in defending your manhood by using lame hash tags, go out there and help someone who needs it. Go stand beside them (women) and let them know that you’re all ears. Ask them to share and let the weight off their chests, instead of washing your hands off the situation.
And women, learn to respect your dignity by taking appropriate steps without thinking about the society’s perception of you. The society will just apathetically rubberneck at your agony. So stand up! Stand up for you. Look out for each other. Learn the art of “NO.” Raise your voice. “Help Me.” How can two little words be so hard to say?
Lastly, to the few misandric women who refer to themselves as Feminists, I have something to tell you too. I know, you right there, are very happy in that little bubble of yours believing that being a Feminist, means hating men. I am not at all sorry to burst your bubble and break it out to you that Feminism isn’t man hating. “Whaaaaaaat!?” Yes.
SO STOP DOING/SAYING SUCH THINGS WHICH LEAD PEOPLE TO CONSIDER FEMINISM AN INSULT.
It’s almost every day, that I find posts that say: “Men are bullshit. I hate men.” Well, did you hit your head on something as a child? I can’t possibly imagine why you’d speak such ill, demented shit about men. Lying, ostracizing, generalizing, victimizing and hating aren’t the right way to fight for equality, no matter what you may call yourself.
Are you even aware of the fact that men can be victims of abuse too. Most of the times, the cases in which men face the assault go unheard because of the widespread impression that it is always women who are left battered and bruised. It is always better to be well informed than just being opinionated based on the half baked beliefs.
Like I said many times before, if you want equality, destroy the idea that men should treat women with respect because we are their daughters, wives, sisters; Add fuel to the idea that men should treat women with respect because we are humans. Also, remember that it won’t always be beneficial to you.
And FYI – Yes, I am a Feminist. No I don’t hate men.
It’s probably because of you, people hate feminists. So, grow up!
May you be blessed with a better mindset.
Now don’t tell me it isn’t that simple, it fucking is. And because you refuse to believe that, this will continue to happen. So do not actively participate in this social apathy. Make this world a better place, toh zyada ho gaya. India ko pehle jaisa toh kardo bhai. A safer place? Maybe?
Bring a change. Be the change.
Till then, #YesAllMen #YesAllWomen #YesTheSociety #YesEverybody is responsible.
PS – This shit was so grave; it caused me, a woman who generally motivates, to go on a rant. Thank you for your patience. Sorry. Ugh. =_=